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關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文閱讀

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關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文閱讀

  近年來(lái),英語(yǔ)繼續(xù)教育的快速發(fā)展極大地促進(jìn)了中國(guó)全民英語(yǔ)水平的提高,同時(shí)也推動(dòng)了社會(huì)的繁榮進(jìn)步。小編精心收集了關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文,供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!

  關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文篇1

  A newspaper organized a contest for the best answer to the question: "If a fire broke out in the Louvre, and if you could only save one painting, which one would you carry out?"

  The winning reply was: "The one nearest the exit."

  一份報(bào)紙組織了一場(chǎng)競(jìng)賽,為下面的問(wèn)題征集最佳答案:“如果盧浮宮起了火,而你只能救出一幅畫(huà),你將救出哪一幅?”

  獲獎(jiǎng)的答案是:“最接近門口的那一幅。”

  關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文篇2

  The squad were having “visual training”. One smart recruit was asked by the officer to count how many men composed a digging party in a distant field.The party was so faraway that the men appeared as mere dots, but unhesitatinglythe recruit replied: “Sixteen men and a sergeant,sir.” “Right;but how do you know there's a sergeant there?” “He's not doing any digging,sir.”

  班里正在進(jìn)行“視力訓(xùn)練”。一個(gè)聰明伶俐的新兵被班長(zhǎng)叫出來(lái)數(shù)遠(yuǎn)處曠野上采掘隊(duì)的人數(shù)。采掘隊(duì)在很遠(yuǎn)的地方,那些人看起來(lái)只是一些小點(diǎn)兒。但是這個(gè)新兵毫不猶豫地回答。 “十六個(gè)兵外加一個(gè)中士,長(zhǎng)官。” “正確,可是你怎么知道那兒有一個(gè)中士?” “他不干活,長(zhǎng)官。”

  關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文篇3

  Younger Scout: How can I tell the difference between a mushroom and a toadstool(毒菌) ?Older Scout: Just eat one before you go to bed. If you wake up the next morning, it was a mushroom.

  年少的童子軍:我怎樣才能把蘑菇和毒蕈區(qū)別開(kāi)呢?年長(zhǎng)的童子軍:上床前吃一個(gè)。如果你第二天早上醒來(lái),那就是蘑菇。

  關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文篇4

  roast pig

  A gentleman was invited for dinner. When he hurried there and sat down, he was happy to see a roast pig in front of his seat:"Not bad, I am next to the pig." But then he noticed the angry fat lady sitting next to him. He faked a smile and added: "Oh I am sorry, I meant the roasted one on the table."

  烤乳豬

  一位先生去赴宴遲到了,匆忙入座后,發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的座位正對(duì)著乳豬,于是大為高興的說(shuō):“還不錯(cuò),我坐在乳豬的旁邊。”這時(shí)才發(fā)現(xiàn)身旁的一位胖女士正怒目相視,他忙陪笑改口到:“對(duì)不起,我說(shuō)的是那只烤好的。”

  關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文篇5

  One stupid guy reads an ad about a vacation cruise that costs only $ 100.After he signs up and pays, the travel agent hits him with a bat, knocks him unconscious and throws him out the back door into the river. Soon another guy comes in, pays his fee and gets the same treatment.

  Fifteen minutes later, as the two are floating down the river together, the first man says, "I wonder if they're serving any food on this cruise."

  "I don' t know, the second guy replied. "They didn't last year."

  一愚笨之人讀到一則假日巡航游只須花100元的廣告。在他簽了字付了款后,旅游經(jīng)紀(jì)人用棒猛擊了他一下,把他打昏了過(guò)去,并把他從后門扔進(jìn)了河里。不久又來(lái)了一個(gè)人,付了錢并得到了相同的待遇。 十五分鐘后,這兩個(gè)人一起向河的下游漂去。第一個(gè)人說(shuō):“不知道他們這次巡航游是否提供食物。” “不知道,”第二個(gè)人說(shuō)道,“去年是沒(méi)有的。”

  
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