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關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文帶翻譯閱讀

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關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文帶翻譯閱讀

  幽默是一種潤(rùn)膚膏,它使我避免了許多摩擦和痛苦。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文帶翻譯,歡迎閱讀!

  關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文帶翻譯篇一

  Three men were bragging about how smart their cats are. The first man was an Accountant, the second man was a Chemist, the third was a Government Worker.

  To show off, the Accountant called his cat and said, "Spreadsheet, do your stuff." Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 3 equal piles of 4 cookies each. Everyone agreed that was good.

  But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop. Everyone agreed that was good.

  Then the two men turned to the Government Worker and said, "What can your cat do?" The Government Worker called to his cat and said, "Coffee Break, do your stuff." Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, peed on the paper, assaulted the other three cats, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for Workers Compensation and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.

  三個(gè)男人在吹噓他們的貓有多么聰明。第一個(gè)男人是個(gè)會(huì)計(jì)師,第二個(gè)男人是個(gè)化學(xué)家,第三個(gè)則是個(gè)公務(wù)員。

  為了炫耀,會(huì)計(jì)師叫來(lái)他的貓,然后說(shuō):“Spreadsheet,干你的活去。”Spreadsheet走進(jìn)了廚房,拿回來(lái)一打曲奇餅干,再分成3堆,每堆四塊。每個(gè)人都覺(jué)得干的很好。

  但是化學(xué)家說(shuō)他的貓可以做的更好。他叫來(lái)他的貓然后說(shuō):“Measure,干你的活去。”Measure起身,走到冰箱那去,拿出來(lái)一夸脫牛奶,再?gòu)臋还窭锬贸鲆粋€(gè)10盎司的玻璃杯,在里面準(zhǔn)確無(wú)誤地倒入了8盎司牛奶,一滴都沒(méi)撒。每個(gè)人都覺(jué)得干的很好。

  這三個(gè)人對(duì)公務(wù)員說(shuō),“你的貓可以干什么?”公務(wù)員叫來(lái)他的貓然后說(shuō):“Coffee break,干你的活去。”Coffee Break跳到他的腳邊,吃掉了曲奇,喝掉了牛奶,這樣做的時(shí)候號(hào)稱背受傷了,然后寫(xiě)了一份委屈的報(bào)告說(shuō)工作環(huán)境實(shí)在不安全,交給工會(huì)后,回家度過(guò)了剩下的一天。

  關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文帶翻譯篇二

  The Broom Seller and the Barber

  賣掃帚的人和理發(fā)師

  A man who sold brooms went into a barber’s shop to get shaved. The barber brought one of his brooms. After he had shaved him, he asked for the price of the brooms.

  一個(gè)賣掃帚的人去理發(fā)店修面。理發(fā)師從他那里買了一把掃帚。當(dāng)理發(fā)師給他修面后,問(wèn)一下他掃帚的價(jià)格。

  “Two pence,” said the man.

  賣掃帚的人說(shuō):“兩個(gè)便士。”

  “No, no,” said the barber. “I will give you a penny, and if you don’t think that is enough, you may take your broom back!”

  “不,不。”理發(fā)師說(shuō):“我只出一個(gè)便士,如果你認(rèn)為不夠的話,可以把掃帚拿回去。”

  The man took it and asked what he had to pay his shave.

  賣掃帚的人拿回了掃帚,隨后問(wèn)修面要付多少錢。

  “A penny,” said the barber.

  “一便士。”理發(fā)師說(shuō)。

  “I will give you a half penny, and if that is not enough, you may put my beard on again.”

  賣掃帚的人說(shuō):“我給你半個(gè)便士,如果不夠的話,請(qǐng)把我的胡子還給我。”

  關(guān)于英語(yǔ)幽默短文帶翻譯篇三

  New friends

  新朋友

  When my wife,Diana, and I met a new couple at church one Sunday, we stopped to introduce ourselves and to exchange pleasantries. We described the friendly neighborhood we lived in,and listened sympathetically as they lamented that theirs was just the opposite.

  一個(gè)星期天,我和妻子戴安娜去教堂時(shí),碰到了一對(duì)新婚的夫婦。于是,我們停下車,向他們做了自我介紹,我們之間還表達(dá)了相互認(rèn)識(shí)的喜悅之情。我們的話題開(kāi)始談到了鄰居,我們說(shuō)我們的鄧居如何如何的好。當(dāng)他們說(shuō)到他們的鄰居恰恰相反時(shí),我們表示了對(duì)他們的同情。

  Saying our good-byes, we got in our cars and drove home. As we approached our house,we were horrified to see that our new-found friends were pulling into the driveway next to ours.

  后來(lái),我們向他們道了別,開(kāi)車回到了家。當(dāng)我們把車子開(kāi)到家門口時(shí),我們驚奇地發(fā)現(xiàn)我們的新結(jié)識(shí)的那對(duì)新婚夫婦把車停在了隔璧的停車道上。

  
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