小學(xué)五年級(jí)英語(yǔ)笑話閱讀
笑話大多揭示生活中乖謬的現(xiàn)象,具有諷刺性和娛樂(lè)性。幾乎所有笑話都包含兩個(gè)要點(diǎn):一是笑話開頭,二是笑點(diǎn)。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理的小學(xué)五年級(jí)英語(yǔ)笑話，歡迎閱讀!
小學(xué)五年級(jí)英語(yǔ)笑話篇一
Do You Know Santa's True Profession?
Consider the following:
1. You never actually see Santa, only his "assistants."
2. Santa keeps his job until he decides to retire.
3. Santa doesn't really do the work; he directs a bunch of helpers to do all his work for him, but he's the one who everybody credits with the work.
4. Santa doesn't work a 40-hour week.
5. Santa travels a lot.
Santa is obviously a senior faculty member with tenure!
圣誕老人的真實(shí)職業(yè)是什么?
考慮以下幾點(diǎn)
1. 你其實(shí)從來(lái)沒(méi)見過(guò)圣誕老人，你看見的都是他得助手(他得助手真的好多，除了過(guò)圣誕節(jié)的所有父母外，還有職業(yè)“圣誕老人”)
2. 圣誕老人不想退休，就可以一直當(dāng)他的圣誕老人。
3. 圣誕老人不會(huì)做實(shí)事，他都是指揮一堆幫手幫他做完所有的事情，但是事情做得好還是不好，功績(jī)和責(zé)任都算圣誕老人的。
4. 圣誕老人實(shí)行的可不是朝九晚五雙休制。
5. 圣誕老人經(jīng)常旅行
圣誕老人顯然是一個(gè)高級(jí)職員(please, 這世界上還有比他的工作更好的工作嗎?)
小學(xué)五年級(jí)英語(yǔ)笑話篇二
How to be like a gentleman
Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.
The children played for an hour, and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen. She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him, "Now here's a knife, Dick. Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister, but remember to do it like a gentleman."
"Like a gentleman?" Dick asked. "How do gentlemen do it?"
"They always give the bigger piece to the other person." answered his aunt at once.
"Oh" said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,"Cut this cake in half, Catherine.".
迪克年齡七歲，他的妹妹凱瑟琳五歲。一天，媽媽把他們帶到姨媽家去玩，自己就到大城市去買些新的衣服。
孩子們玩了個(gè)把小時(shí)，在四點(diǎn)半的時(shí)候，姨媽領(lǐng)著迪克走進(jìn)了廚房。她交給迪克一塊精美的蛋糕和一把刀子，并對(duì)他說(shuō)：“喏，迪克，給你刀子，把這塊蛋糕一切為二，給你妹妹一塊。不過(guò)，你得記住要做得像一個(gè)紳士那樣。”
迪克問(wèn)：“像一個(gè)紳士?紳士怎樣做呢?”
他姨媽馬上回答說(shuō)：“紳士總是把大的一塊讓給別人的。”
迪克說(shuō)了一聲“噢”。他對(duì)此想了一會(huì)，然后，他把蛋糕拿給妹妹，并對(duì)她說(shuō)：“凱瑟琳，你來(lái)把這塊蛋糕一切為二吧。”
小學(xué)五年級(jí)英語(yǔ)笑話篇三
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流著血回到家里。他媽媽問(wèn)，“發(fā)生了什么事?”
“一個(gè)男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡說(shuō)。
“再見到他你能認(rèn)出來(lái)嗎?”媽媽問(wèn)。
“他走到哪里我都能認(rèn)出他，”伊凡說(shuō)。“他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。”
小學(xué)五年級(jí)英語(yǔ)笑話篇四
A schoolboy went home with a pain in his stomach. Well, sit down and eat your tea, said his mother. Your stomach's hurting because it's empty. It'll be all right when you've got something in it.
Shortly afterwards Dad come in from the office, complaining of a headache.
That's because it's empty, said his bright son. You'd be all right if you had something in it.
一個(gè)男孩放學(xué)回家時(shí)，覺(jué)得肚子痛。來(lái)，坐下，吃點(diǎn)點(diǎn)心，媽媽說(shuō)，你肚子痛是因?yàn)槎亲邮强盏?。吃點(diǎn)東西就會(huì)好的。
一會(huì)兒，男孩的爸爸下班回家了，說(shuō)是頭痛。
你頭痛是因?yàn)槟愕哪X袋是空的，他那聰明的兒子說(shuō)，里面裝點(diǎn)東西，就會(huì)好的。
小學(xué)五年級(jí)英語(yǔ)笑話篇五
In class the teacher showed pictures of various birds. Then he asked one of the students, "What kind of bird do you like best, Jack?"
Jack thought a moment, then answered, "Fried chicken, sir."
老師在課堂上向?qū)W生們展示了各種各樣的鳥的照片。然后他問(wèn)其中一名學(xué)生，“杰克，你最喜歡哪種鳥兒啊?”
杰克想了想，回答，“炸雞，老師。”
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