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趣味幽默英文笑話帶翻譯

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趣味幽默英文笑話帶翻譯

  笑話使人們?cè)诳贪宓纳钪懈械揭唤z快意和放松,在人們的日常生活中起著重要調(diào)劑作用。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)砣の队哪⑽男υ拵Хg,歡迎大家閱讀!

  趣味幽默英文笑話1:

  Three famous surgeons were bragging about(吹噓,炫耀) their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off," said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist(小提琴家) ." "That's nothing," said another. "A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched(縫紉,裝訂)them back on, and today that man is a marathon runner."

  "I can top both of you," said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. There was nothing left but a horse's posterior(后部,臀部) - and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in United States Senate."

  三個(gè)有名的外科醫(yī)生正在吹噓他們的技術(shù),“一個(gè)人斷了一只手,他來找我,”一個(gè)說,“如今那個(gè)人是個(gè)音樂會(huì)的小提琴手。”

  “這算不了什么,”另一個(gè)說,“一個(gè)家伙兩條腿斷了,他來找我,我將它們接了回去。如今,那人是馬拉松選手。”

  “我比你們兩個(gè)都強(qiáng),”第三個(gè)說,“一天,我碰到一起可怕的車禍,除了一個(gè)馬屁股,和一幅眼睛,什么都沒有留下。如今,那人坐在美國參議院里。”

  趣味幽默英文笑話2:

  "All the kids make fun of me," the boy cried to his mother, "They say I have a big head."

  "Don't listen to them," his mother comforted him, "You have a beautiful head. Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes."

  "Where's the shopping bag?"

  "I haven't got one, use your hat."

  “所有的孩子都拿我開玩笑,”小男孩哭著跟媽媽說:“他們說我長(zhǎng)了一個(gè)大腦袋。”

  “別聽他們的,”他媽媽安慰說:“你的腦袋長(zhǎng)得很漂亮。好了,別哭了,去商店買10磅土豆來。”

  “購物袋在哪?”

  “我沒有購物袋,就用你的帽子吧。”

  趣味幽默英文笑話3:

  "I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles.

  "When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down."

  “研究生班和本科生很容易就能區(qū)別開來,”在洛杉磯加利福利亞州立大學(xué)給我們研究生上工程學(xué)課的老師如此說。

  “我說‘下午好’,本科生們回答說‘下午好’。研究生們則把我說的話記在筆記本上。”

  趣味幽默英文笑話4:

  Many years after receiving my graduate degree, I returned to the State University of New York at Binghamton as a faculty member. One day in a crowded elevator, someone remarked on itsinefficiency. I said the elevators had not changed in the 20 years since I began there as a student.

  When the door finally opened, I felt a compassionate pat on my back, and turned to see an elderly nun smiling at me. "You'll get that degree, dear," she whispered. "Perseverance is a virtue."

  獲取研究生學(xué)位多年以后,我回到位于賓翰頓的紐約州立大學(xué)當(dāng)教員。一天,電梯里很擁擠,有人抱怨電梯效率太低。我說自我在那里當(dāng)學(xué)生起,20年來電梯一直沒有換過。

  最后當(dāng)電梯門打開時(shí),我感到有人在我的背上同情地拍了一下,回過頭來我看到一位年長(zhǎng)的修女正在朝我微笑。“你會(huì)拿到學(xué)位的,親愛的,”她低聲說道:“堅(jiān)持不懈是一種美德。”

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