簡(jiǎn)單和好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話
長(zhǎng)期以來(lái)，幽默笑話因其在人際交往中的神奇效果，已經(jīng)成為研究者們普遍關(guān)心的話題。本文是簡(jiǎn)單和好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話，希望對(duì)大家有幫助!
簡(jiǎn)單和好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇一
when i take a long time, i am slow.
when my boss takes a long time, he is thorough.
when i don't do it, i am lazy.
when my boss doesn't do it, he is too busy.
when i do something without being told, i am trying to be smart.
when my boss does the same, that is initiative.
when i please my boss, i am ass-kissing.
when my boss pleases his boss, he is co-operating.
i do good, my boss never remembers.
when i do wrong, he never forgets.
我做事情花了長(zhǎng)時(shí)間，是效率低;
老板做事情花了長(zhǎng)時(shí)間，是深思熟慮。
我沒(méi)有做完事情，是懶惰;
老板沒(méi)有做完事情，是太繁忙。
沒(méi)有人告訴我的事情我做了，是自作聰明;
老板做了同樣的事情，是首創(chuàng)。
我取悅老板，是獻(xiàn)媚;
老板取悅他的老板，是合作。
我干得好，老板從來(lái)不會(huì)想起;
我干得不好，老板從來(lái)不會(huì)忘記。
簡(jiǎn)單和好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇二
an old man lived alone in northern ireland. his only son was in
prison. the old man wanted to plant some potatoes in his garden but he didn't know anyone who would help him plow up the garden.
he wrote to his son about it, and received this reply, "for heavens sake, don't dig up that garden, that's where i buried the guns!"
at 4 am the next morning, a dozen british soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden, but didn't find any guns.
confused, the man wrote to his son telling him what happened and asking him what to do next.
his son's reply was: "just plant your potatoes."
一個(gè)老人獨(dú)居在北愛(ài)爾蘭，他的獨(dú)生子正在坐牢。老人想在花園里種些土豆，但不知道誰(shuí)可以幫忙把泥土翻松。他寫信想兒子提及此事，兒子回信說(shuō)道：“看在上帝的面上，千萬(wàn)不要翻松花園的泥土，我把槍埋在那兒了。”
第二天凌晨4點(diǎn)，一隊(duì)英國(guó)士兵出現(xiàn)在老人家中，在花園把土地翻遍，但并沒(méi)有找到任何槍支。”
老人寫信告訴兒子這件奇怪的事情，問(wèn)到底發(fā)生了什么事情，下一步應(yīng)該怎么做。
兒子回信道：“你只管種土豆好了。”
簡(jiǎn)單和好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話篇三
one day a little girl came home from school, and said to her mother, "mommy, today in school i was punished for something that i didn't do."
the mother exclaimed, "but that's terrible! i'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this! by the way, what was it that you didn't do?"
the little girl replied, "my homework."
一天，小女孩從學(xué)校回到家里，對(duì)媽媽說(shuō)：“媽媽，今天在學(xué)校里我因?yàn)橐患覜](méi)有做的事情而受到懲罰。”
媽媽激動(dòng)地說(shuō)：“那真是太可怕了!我要跟你的老師好好談一談，對(duì)了，你沒(méi)有做過(guò)的那件事是什么?”
小女孩回答說(shuō)：“我的家庭作業(yè)。”
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