英語(yǔ)笑話好笑最簡(jiǎn)單的
英語(yǔ)笑話好笑最簡(jiǎn)單的
政治笑話是一種口頭表演藝術(shù)形式,其創(chuàng)作和傳播的主體是普通民眾,客體是政治體系。下面小編整理了英語(yǔ)笑話最好笑最簡(jiǎn)單的，希望大家喜歡!
英語(yǔ)笑話最好笑最簡(jiǎn)單的摘抄
A Plumber
My daughter Judy, who works for a plumbing company, found herself in need of a plumber athome. When she got to work, she asked that a plumber be sent. For several days her requestwas ignored.
In desperation, as she departed one afternoon she left her boss this note - "I will come towork in the morning as soon as a plumber gets to my house. " One arrived shortly before 7 a.m.
管道修理工
我女兒朱迪在一家管道公司工作。一日，她發(fā)現(xiàn)自己家里需要一個(gè)管道修理工。于是，去上班時(shí)，她要求派一個(gè)管修工到她家里。但一連幾天，她的要求都沒(méi)有得到回應(yīng)。
出于無(wú)奈，一天下午下班時(shí)，她給老板留下這樣一張字條：“明早管修工一到我家，我即刻來(lái)上班。”第二天早晨還不到七點(diǎn)鐘就來(lái)了一位管修工。
英語(yǔ)笑話最好笑最簡(jiǎn)單的鑒賞
拜倒在你的腳下
It was rush hour and I was dashing to a train in New York City's Grand Central Terminal - As Ineared the gate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing on thesmooth marble floor and slid onto her back. Her momentum carried her close to my shoes.Before I could help her, however, she had scrambled up. Gaining her composure, she winkedat me and said, "Do you always have beautiful women failing at your feet?"
上下班高峰期，我匆匆奔向紐約豪華中心站去趕一趟火車。接近門(mén)口，一位肥胖的中年婦女從后面沖過(guò)來(lái)，沒(méi)想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了腳，仰面滑倒了。她的慣性使她接近了我的腳。我正準(zhǔn)備扶她，她卻自己爬了起來(lái)。她鎮(zhèn)定了一下，對(duì)我擠了一下眉，說(shuō)道：“總是有漂亮女人拜倒在你腳下嗎?”
英語(yǔ)笑話最好笑最簡(jiǎn)單的賞析
回答的技巧
Vacationing on the island of Oahu, we were waiting in our tour bus for some stragglers to show up. A man, obviously not with our group, approached the bus and was about to board. How would our driver handle the situation, we wondered. Straight-faced, he leaned toward the door and asked, "Going to the nudist Colony, sir?"
"Oh, no," replied the would-be passenger, retreating quickly.
"Works every time," the driver said with a wink.
在瓦湖島上度假時(shí)，我們坐在旅游車?yán)锏群虻絷?duì)的人。一位男子，明顯不是和我們一起的，朝旅游車走來(lái)并要上車。司機(jī)會(huì)怎么處理這種情況呢?我們都拭目以待。司機(jī)拉長(zhǎng)了臉，向車門(mén)靠過(guò)去，問(wèn)道：“先生，是去裸體營(yíng)地嗎?”
“哦，不，”剛想乘車的男子回答說(shuō)，迅速轉(zhuǎn)身而逃。
“每次都管用，”司機(jī)眨巴了一下眼睛說(shuō)
英語(yǔ)笑話最好笑最簡(jiǎn)單的欣賞
A Bad Doctor
A man walked into a doctor's examining room.
"Put out your tongue," the doctor said.
The man put out his tongue and the doctor said.
"0. K. You can put your tongue back now. " the doctor said. "it's clear what's wrong withyou . You need more exercise."
"But, doctor, " the man said. "I don't think--"
" Don't tell I me what you think, " the doctor said 揑 am the doctor, not you. I know whatyou need. I see hundreds of people like you. None of them get any exercise. They sit in officesall day and in front of the television in the evening. What you need is to walk quickly for at least20 minutes a day. "
"Doctor, you don't understand," the patient said "I -"
"I don't want to hear any excuses, " the doctor said. "You must find time for exercise. Ifyou don't, you will get fat and have health problems when you are older. "
"But I walk every clay," the patient said.
"Oh, yes, and I know what kind of walking that is. You walk a few feet to the train stationfrom your house, a few more feet from the station to your office , and a few more feet fromyour office to a restaurant for lunch and back. That's not real walking. I'm talking about a walkin the park for twenty minutes every day. "
Please listen to me, doctor! " the patient shouted, getting angry with this doctor whothought he knew everything.
"I'm a mailman," the patient went on, "and I walk for seven hours every day. "
For a moment the doctor was silent, then he said quietly, "Put your tongue out again, willyou?"
庸醫(yī)
一人走進(jìn)一家診所。
“伸出舌頭，”醫(yī)生說(shuō)。
那人伸出舌頭，醫(yī)生很快地看了一下。
“好了，把舌頭縮回去吧。”醫(yī)生說(shuō)，“你的病因很明顯。你需要更多的運(yùn)動(dòng)。”
“但是，醫(yī)生，”那人說(shuō)，“我不認(rèn)為----”
“不要告訴我你認(rèn)為怎么樣，”醫(yī)生說(shuō)，“我是醫(yī)生，不是你。我知道你需要什么。我看過(guò)數(shù)以百計(jì)的你這樣的病人。他們沒(méi)有一個(gè)人鍛煉過(guò)。他們整天坐在辦公室里，晚上就坐在電視機(jī)前。你所需要的是每天至少快跑20分鐘。”
“醫(yī)生，你不知道，”病人說(shuō)，“我----”
“我不想聽(tīng)任何理由。”醫(yī)生說(shuō)，“你應(yīng)該抽出時(shí)間來(lái)運(yùn)動(dòng)。如果你不鍛煉，那么當(dāng)你老的時(shí)候，你就會(huì)變得很胖，并且有健康問(wèn)題。”
“但我每天都走路的，”病人說(shuō)。
“喔，是的。我知道那是一種怎樣的散步。你走幾英尺的路，從家到火車站，又走幾英尺從車站到辦公室，然后走幾英尺從辦公室到餐館去吃中飯?jiān)倩貋?lái)。那不是真正的散步。我所說(shuō)的是每天在公園里散步20分鐘。”
“請(qǐng)聽(tīng)我說(shuō)，醫(yī)生!”病人叫起來(lái)，對(duì)那位自以為什么都知道的醫(yī)生很生氣。
“我是一名郵遞員，”病人接著說(shuō)，“我每天得走7小時(shí)的路。”
醫(yī)生悶在那里半天無(wú)語(yǔ)。然后他輕聲地說(shuō)：“再把你的舌頭伸出來(lái)，行嗎?”