有趣英語(yǔ)冷笑話

有趣英語(yǔ)冷笑話

　　下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理的有趣英語(yǔ)冷笑話，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　有趣英語(yǔ)冷笑話：

　　我丈夫剛進(jìn)來(lái)

　　The couple seated in restaurant seemed to be having a wonderful time. But as the woman glanced away from the table，their waiter suddenly rushed over.

　　在飯館里坐著一對(duì)夫婦，他們看上去非常高興。但是當(dāng)那女子向旁邊瞥了一眼時(shí)，服務(wù)員馬上跑了過(guò)來(lái)。

　　“Madam look,”he said.“Your husband just slid under the table.”

　　“夫人，您瞧,” 他說(shuō),“您丈夫滑到桌子底下去了。”

　　“No,he didn't,”she replied.“My husband just came in the door.”

　　“不，他沒(méi)有,” 她回答,“我丈夫剛從門(mén)外進(jìn)來(lái)。”

　　有趣英語(yǔ)冷笑話：有兩條褲子

　　A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible,” she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”

　　丈夫下班回到家里，發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的新娘心緒煩亂。“我心里太難受了，”她說(shuō)。“我在給你熨西裝時(shí)把褲子的臀部燒了個(gè)大洞。”

　　“Forget it ,” consoled her husband. “Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that suit.”

　　“沒(méi)事兒，”丈夫安慰她說(shuō)。“你忘了我這套衣服有兩條褲子。”

　　“Yes,” said the woman, cheering up. "And it’s lucky you have. I used them to patch the hole.”

　　“是的，”妻子高興地說(shuō)，“幸虧你還有一條，我后來(lái)就用它來(lái)補(bǔ)了這個(gè)洞了。”

　　有趣英語(yǔ)冷笑話：死于肝癌的人100%都吃飯

　　Wife:You see.According to te statistics on the paper 80% of

　　those who have died of liver cancer have drunk alcoho.

　　妻子：你瞧，根據(jù)這報(bào)上登的統(tǒng)計(jì)數(shù)字，那些死于肝癌的人有80%都喝酒。

　　Husband:It's okey. To my investigation, all Thespeopleeat　meals.

　　丈夫：那就不錯(cuò)了。據(jù)我調(diào)查，所有這些人都吃飯呢。

　　有趣英語(yǔ)冷笑話：But the teacher cried 可是老師哭了

　　The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled(被寵壞的) . His father knew it, but his grandma doted on him. He hardly left her side. And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum(亂發(fā)脾氣) . Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.

　　When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door.

　　Was school all right? she asked, Did you get along all right? did you cry?

　　Cry? John asked. No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!

　　六歲的約翰嬌生慣養(yǎng)。他的父親知道這一點(diǎn)，可他的祖父母仍然寵著他。這孩子幾乎寸步不離他的祖母。他想要什么不是哭，就是鬧。他第一天上學(xué)才離開(kāi)祖母的懷抱。

　　約翰放學(xué)了，他奶奶在門(mén)口接他并問(wèn)道：學(xué)校怎么樣?你過(guò)的好嗎?哭了沒(méi)有?

　　哭?約翰問(wèn)，不，我沒(méi)哭，可老師哭了。

　　有趣英語(yǔ)冷笑話：Two Birds 兩只鳥(niǎo)

　　Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

　　Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

　　Teacher: Please tell us.

　　Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

　　老師： 這兒有兩只鳥(niǎo)，一只是麻雀。誰(shuí)能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀嗎?

　　學(xué)生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

　　老師：請(qǐng)說(shuō)說(shuō)看。

　　學(xué)生：燕子旁邊的就是麻雀，麻雀旁邊的就是燕子。

　　有趣英語(yǔ)冷笑話：A Present 凱特的禮物

　　Kate: Mom, do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday?

　　Mom: No, Honey, what?

　　Kate: A nice teapot.

　　Mom: But I've got a nice teapot.

　　Kate: No, you haven't. I've just dropped it.

　　凱特：媽媽，你知道我要給你一件什么生日禮物嗎?

　　媽媽：不知道，寶貝，是什么呀?

　　凱特：一把漂亮的茶壺。

　　媽媽：可是我已經(jīng)有一把漂亮的茶壺了呀。

　　凱特：不，你沒(méi)有了。我剛剛把它給摔了。