最搞笑的短篇英文笑話
笑話不僅能夠折射出社會(huì)生活中的方方面面,而且笑話可以在說笑中蘊(yùn)含著人們對(duì)于美好生活的期盼和訴求。小編精心收集了最搞笑的短篇英文笑話，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
最搞笑的短篇英文笑話篇1
Mrs. Flinders decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me withdiamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant."
"But you're not wearing any of those things."
"I know," said Mrs. Flinders." It's in case I should die before my husband. I'm sure he'dremarry right away, and I want her to go nuts looking for the jewelry."
福林德斯夫人決定讓人給她畫肖像。她告訴那位肖像畫家說：“畫我?guī)е@石耳環(huán)、鉆石項(xiàng)鏈、祖母綠手鐲，還有紅寶石垂飾。”
“但你現(xiàn)在沒帶這其中的任何一樣飾品。”
“我知道。”福林德斯夫人說，“萬一我先我丈夫死去，我肯定他會(huì)立刻再婚。我要讓那個(gè)女人為尋找這些珠寶而發(fā)瘋。”
最搞笑的短篇英文笑話篇2
As a new father, I quickly learned the true meaning of maternal instinct. Late one night, Iwas summoned to the hospital to attend to one of my patients. I quietly got up in the dark buttripped over a toy and crashed to the floor. As I lay there rubbing my sore leg, my wife slepton.
Then there was a faint cough from the nursery. Debra leaped out of bed, running past medown the hall to our baby's room. When she returned, she looked at me and said, "What onearth are you doing on the floor?"
剛剛作了父親，我就很快體會(huì)到母性本能的涵義了。一個(gè)深夜，醫(yī)院召我去照應(yīng)一位病人。我悄悄地在黑暗中起了床，但一只腳絆在一個(gè)玩具上，撲通一聲摔在地板上。我倒在那里，揉著疼痛的腿，妻子毫無反應(yīng)地繼續(xù)睡著。
突然，嬰兒房傳來輕微的咳嗽聲。戴博拉躍下床來，從我身邊跑過，下了客廳到我們嬰兒的房間。她返回來時(shí)，看了看我說：“你究竟在地板上干什么?”
最搞笑的短篇英文笑話篇3
As a freshman at the University of Dayton in Ohio, I was eager to make a good impression onmy new roommate. When I arrived at our dorm room, I found her putting on perfume. "That'sa great scent," I said, making conversation.
"Thanks-it was from my boyfriend. Here, try some," she said, holding the bottle out for me.
Unfortunately she let go before I had a firm grip, and the glass shattered on the tile floor. , Embarrassed, I tried to apologize, but she cut me off - "Actually, it's kind of fitting," sheexplained, surveying the damage. "That's exactly how the relationship went.
作為俄亥俄州代頓大學(xué)的一名新生，我急于給我的新宿舍同伴留個(gè)好印象。我到了寢室，看到她正在往身上灑香水。“香味真濃哇。”我說，想和她搭起話來。
“謝了，我男朋友送的，來，灑些試試。”她說著把瓶子遞給我。
不幸的是，我還沒抓牢，她就松手了，玻璃瓶在瓷磚地板上摔碎了。我感到很窘，我剛想道歉，她就打斷了我。“事實(shí)上，應(yīng)該如此。” 她解釋道，查看著破碎的瓶子，“我和他的關(guān)系正是這樣的。”
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