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英語(yǔ)笑話短文欣賞

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

英語(yǔ)笑話短文欣賞

  在交際場(chǎng)合,能恰到好處地講個(gè)笑話或自創(chuàng)一個(gè)幽默,不僅可以體現(xiàn)自己的語(yǔ)言水平,還可以提升個(gè)人魅力。 小編精心收集了有關(guān)英語(yǔ)笑話故事,供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!

  有關(guān)英語(yǔ)笑話故事:絕配

  A wealthy matron is so proud of a valuable antique vase that she decides to have her bedroom painted the same color as the vase. Several painters try to match the shade, but none comes close enough to satisfy the eccentric woman.

  Eventually, a painter approaches who is confident he can mix the proper color. The woman is pleased with the result, and the painter becomes famous.

  Years later, he retires and turns the business over to his son."Dad, “says the son, there’s something I’ve got to know. How did you get those walls to match the vase so perfectly?"

  "Son”, the father replies, I painted the vase."

  一個(gè)富有的主婦很是驕傲因?yàn)樗詹亓艘患浅S袃r(jià)值的古董花瓶,于是她決定把臥室粉刷成與花瓶同樣的顏色。許多油漆匠都試圖盡力與花瓶的顏色匹配,但是沒(méi)有任何人能做得 讓那古怪的女人滿意的。

  一個(gè)油漆匠很自信他能做到,最終他成功了。那個(gè)主婦很滿意,于是這個(gè)油漆匠也變得很出名。

  多年以后,油漆匠要退休了,他把自己的生意交給兒子去經(jīng)營(yíng)。“爸爸”兒子問(wèn)“我還有些事情想知道,你怎么能把墻粉刷得和花瓶的顏色那么相配?”“兒子”爸爸回答到“我只不過(guò)是把花瓶刷了。”

  有關(guān)英語(yǔ)笑話故事:超速

  Traveling salesmen make their living visiting as many customers as possible. So speeding to get from one appointment to the next is not unheard-of. Which is how I got pulled over by a highway patrolman. "Don't you ever look at the speedometer?" the officer scolded. Before I knew it, the truth spilled from my mouth. "As fast as I was going," I admitted, "I was afraid to take my eyes off the road."

  因?yàn)槁眯型其N員為了謀生需要拜訪盡量多的客戶,所以超速飛車(chē)趕場(chǎng)對(duì)于他們來(lái)說(shuō)也不是沒(méi)有過(guò)的事情。有一次我就因?yàn)槌俣刃旭偙灰粋€(gè)公路巡警攔了下來(lái)。“你有沒(méi)有看過(guò)你的時(shí)速表?”那名警官責(zé)問(wèn)。當(dāng)我的回答一出口,我立刻后悔了,但已經(jīng)太晚了。“車(chē)開(kāi)得越來(lái)越快”,我如實(shí)地說(shuō),“我的眼睛得一直盯著前面,沒(méi)敢看別的”。

  有關(guān)英語(yǔ)笑話故事:哪有人能彎腰彎那么低的

  Our manager at the restaurant where I worked was a much beloved, jovial man. But there was one subject you didn't dare discuss in front of him -- his height. or, should I say, his lack of it.One day, he stormed through the door and announced angrily, "Someone just picked my pocket!" Most of my fellow waitresses and I were speechless, except for the one who blurted out, "How could anyone stoop so low?"

  我們的餐廳經(jīng)理是一位深受大家愛(ài)戴,和藹而又快樂(lè)的人。但在他面前有一件事不能提--他的身高?;蛘?,我應(yīng)該說(shuō),他是有點(diǎn)矮!一天,經(jīng)理怒氣沖沖地撞門(mén)而入,高聲說(shuō),“有人拿了我的錢(qián)包!”

  我和其她大部女招待都沒(méi)敢吱聲,但有人卻蹦出一句話:“哪有人能彎腰彎那么低的啊”!

  有關(guān)英語(yǔ)笑話故事:如是請(qǐng)求

  I had fallen and dislocated my elbow, which made writing checks for my small business nearly impossible. I called my bank to explain that the signature on my checks would look odd due to my accident, and would they please horror them anyway.

  "Okay," said the woman on the phone, "but you' 11 have to write a letter to the bank telling them that you are requesting this. "

  我摔倒了,肘骨脫臼了。這使得我?guī)缀醪荒芙o我的小生意簽賬單了。我打電話給銀行解釋說(shuō)由于事故,賬單上我的簽名看起來(lái)會(huì)有些古怪,并請(qǐng)求他們無(wú)論如何給予承兌。

  “好的,”電話中的女子說(shuō),“但你必須給銀行寫(xiě)封信,告訴他們你在作此項(xiàng)請(qǐng)求。”

  
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