超級(jí)好笑的英語笑話集錦
笑話是幽默的語言表達(dá)。它是一種常見的幽默傳達(dá)方式。笑話是口頭或者書面的幽默語言。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來的超級(jí)好笑的英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!
超級(jí)好笑的英語笑話篇一
直言不諱
My husband bought me an automatic dishwasher for my birthday. In filling out the guarantee，he came across the question，“What year and model dishwasher did you're place?"He wrote:"Wife—Age 24".
我丈夫在我生日那天給我買了臺(tái)全自動(dòng)洗碗機(jī)。在填寫保修單葉，他看到里面有一項(xiàng)是:“你替換的舊洗碗機(jī)是哪年生產(chǎn)的，什么型號(hào)?”我丈夫?qū)懙?“妻子—24歲”。
超級(jí)好笑的英語笑話篇二
夢(mèng)幻世界
A hotel manager in a small town reports that a guest woke up everyone in the hotel screaming，"It's in the phone book! It's in the the phone book!"
飯店經(jīng)理報(bào)告說一名客人把所有的人都吵醒了，他不停地尖叫:“就在電話薄里，就在電話薄里。”
The manager got the house detective and they let themselves into the man's room，where they found him in the midst of a nightmare. "I was having a horrible dream，”the man explained when awakened. "I dreamed the income-tax people wanted to send me a big refund, but they'd lost my address!"
經(jīng)理找來偵探后，帶他進(jìn)入了那位客人的房間。原來，那位客人是在做夢(mèng)。“我做了個(gè)非?？膳碌膲?mèng)，”那人醒后解釋說:“我夢(mèng)見收稅人想寄退給我一筆錢，但他們把我的地址給丟了.”
超級(jí)好笑的英語笑話篇三
.跑道已清
An airline ticket agent was being given a particularly rough time by a woman who complained about the departure times. She said，“Young man，I could stick a feather in my ear and get there faster. "
當(dāng)一位飛機(jī)售票員也夠例霉的。一位婦女在向他抱怨飛機(jī)起飛得太晚，這位售票員真不知如何是好。那位婦女說:“年較人，如果我能在我的耳朵土播上羽毛，我都會(huì)比你們的飛機(jī)先到那兒。”
"Madam,"replied the agent calmly,"the runways are clear."
“好啊售票員平靜地說:“現(xiàn)在我們的飛機(jī)跑這正空著呢。”
超級(jí)好笑的英語笑話篇四
一報(bào)還一報(bào)
An acquaintance of mine stopped at a local tavern after work and spent the evening there. When’ he arrived home around ten o'clock, his wife was sitting at the kitchen table，waiting. Instead of questioning or scolding him，however , she simply asked pleasantly if he wanted dinner. He was not interested in eating，and went off to bed.
我的一個(gè)熟人在一次下班后，把車停在了一個(gè)小飯館前，在那兒他消磨可一個(gè)晚上。大約十點(diǎn)鐘他才回到家。他的妻子坐在廚房的桌旁等他。她沒有追問他什么，也沒有責(zé)怪他，只是和藹地問他想不想吃點(diǎn)什么。他已經(jīng)對(duì)晚餐不感興趣，于是，就上床睡覺了。
At 3:30 a. m.，the alarm went off. He scrambled out of bed and turned on the light. When he saw the time, he roared at his wife，demanding an explanation.
大約在凌晨三點(diǎn)半的時(shí)候，鬧鐘突然響了。他趕緊掀開了被子，打開了燈。當(dāng)他看清了時(shí)問時(shí)，他沖妻子大聲地吼叫為什么。
"Well,"she replied placidly, "if it took you four-hours to get home from work，I figured it would take you four hours to get back to work，and I didn't want you to be late. "
妻子和氣地說:“我想，假如你下班回家路止花了四個(gè)小時(shí)的話，你上班當(dāng)然也需要花四個(gè)小時(shí)趕路了。我只是不想讓你遲到。”
超級(jí)好笑的英語笑話篇五
把他送走!
The children begged for a hamster, and after the usual fervent vows that they alone would care for it，they got one. They named it Danny. Two months later, when found herself responsible for cleaning and feediag the creature,she located a prospective new home for it. The children took the news of them remarked,"He's been around here a long time_we'll miss him."
我的孩子們都想要一只倉(cāng)鼠。在他們發(fā)出了堅(jiān)定的誓言—自己照顧那個(gè)動(dòng)物之后，他們真的得到了一只。他們給它取了名字叫“丹尼”。兩個(gè)月后，媽媽終于意識(shí)到實(shí)際上清洗和喂養(yǎng)這只動(dòng)物的事全是由她一人承當(dāng)著。因此，她為那只倉(cāng)鼠找了個(gè)新家。孩于們對(duì)“丹尼”的離開并沒做出什么反應(yīng)。只有其中的一個(gè)說了句:“他和我們?cè)谝黄鹨延泻荛L(zhǎng)一段時(shí)間了—我們會(huì)想他的。”
"Yes,"Mom replied."But he's too much work for one person,and since I'm that one person,I say he goes."
“是呀，”媽媽說，“但是，由一個(gè)人來照顧他也實(shí)在是夠累的。既然我就是那個(gè)人，我說送他走.”
Another child offered,"Well,maybe if he wouldn't eat so much and wouldn't be so messy,we could keep him."
另一個(gè)孩于說:“如果他吃的不那么多，他不那么臟亂，也許我們還能把他留下。”
But Mom was firm."It's time to take Danny to his new home now,"she insisted."Go and get his cage."
但是媽媽很堅(jiān)決:“現(xiàn)在該給丹尼找個(gè)新家了，”媽媽一點(diǎn)兒也不肯讓步。“去把他的籠子拿來。”
With one voice and in tearful outrage the children shouted,"Danny? We thought you said Daddy!"
這時(shí)孩子們異口同聲地喊了起來:“丹尼?我們還以為是送爹爹走呢!”
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