英語(yǔ)小笑話
我國(guó)古代笑話是幾千年來(lái)人民群眾的口頭文學(xué)形式。這些笑話當(dāng)中,有的揭露了當(dāng)時(shí)社會(huì)的各種矛盾;有的反映了豐富多采的階級(jí)斗爭(zhēng)和生產(chǎn)斗爭(zhēng)生活。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來(lái)的英語(yǔ)幽默小故事，歡迎閱讀!
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事篇一
The visit to the doctor 拜訪醫(yī)師
A Man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred .
一個(gè)男人問(wèn)他的醫(yī)師是否認(rèn)為他會(huì)活到一百歲。
The doctor asked the man ,"Do you smoke or drink ?"
醫(yī)師問(wèn)這個(gè)男人：“你抽煙或喝酒嗎?”
" No ,"he replied , "I have never done either ."
他回答說(shuō)：“不，我從不抽煙喝酒。”
" Do you gamble,drive fast cars ,and fool around with woman?" inquired the doctor .
醫(yī)師問(wèn)說(shuō)：“你賭博、開快車、玩女人嗎?”
"No,I have done any of those things either."
“不，我也從不干那些事情。”
"Well then," said the doctor ," what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"
醫(yī)師說(shuō)：“那你干嗎要活到一百歲呀?”
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事篇二
All In the family 都在這一家
All In the family
都在這一家
Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school .
八十歲大的 莎莉從學(xué)校把她的成績(jī)報(bào)告卡帶回家。
Her marks were good mostly .
她的成績(jī)不錯(cuò)，
A's and a couple of B'S .
大部分都是A，還有幾個(gè)B。
However ,her teacher had written across the bottom,
可是， 她韻老師在卡片下方寫道：
"SALLY is a smart little girl,but she has one fault,
“莎莉是個(gè)聰明的小女孩，但是她有一個(gè)毛病。
she talks too much in school.I have an idea I am going to try,
她在學(xué)校太愛講話。我有一個(gè)想法我要來(lái)試試看，
which I think may break her of the bad habit."
我認(rèn)為.這個(gè)想法可能會(huì)讓她改掉這個(gè)壞習(xí)慣。”
Sally's dad signed her report card,
莎莉的爸爸簽了她的學(xué)習(xí)報(bào)告卡，
putting a note on the back ,
并在卡片背面注記：
"Please let me know if your idea work on SALLY
“如果你的想法對(duì)莎莉很有效，請(qǐng)你讓我知道，
because I would like to try it out on her mother."
因?yàn)槲蚁胍阉囉迷谒龐寢屔砩稀?/p>
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事篇三
Gone Shopping 購(gòu)物
Our supermarket had a sald on boneless chicken breasts,and a woman I know ontended tostock up .
我們的超級(jí)市，場(chǎng)在廉價(jià)拍賣無(wú)骨雞胸，我認(rèn)識(shí)的某位女士打算去多買一些。
At the store,However,she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portopnsof the poultry,
然而，到了這家肉店的時(shí)候她感到很失望，因?yàn)橹徽业揭稽c(diǎn)點(diǎn)事先就包裝好的雞肉，
so she complained to the butcher.
所以她就向這位肉店老板抱怨。
"don't worry,lady," he said.
他說(shuō)：“小姐，別擔(dān)心，
"I will pack some more trays and have them ready for you by the time you finish shopping."
我會(huì)替你多包幾盤，在你買完?yáng)|西的時(shí)候把它們準(zhǔn)備好。”
Several aisles later ,my friend heard the butcher's voice boom over th public-address system:
逛完幾個(gè)走道之后，我的朋友聽到肉店老板的聲音透過(guò)公共廣播系統(tǒng)隆隆地說(shuō)
"Will the lady who wanted bigger breasts please meet me at the back of the store?"
“那位想要大胸部的小姐請(qǐng)到本店后方來(lái)見我好嗎?”
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事篇四
浪漫之旅 A romantic trip
A: Hey, good looking, wanna go on a romatic cruise?
A:親愛的，想不想來(lái)一場(chǎng)浪漫之旅
B: Who would book us on a cruise?
B:誰(shuí)能幫我們預(yù)定這次巡航呢?
A: The U.S.S. ark
A:u.s.s方舟
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事篇五
Laboratory Tests 實(shí)驗(yàn)室檢查
Two children were sitting outside a clinic.
有兩個(gè)小孩子坐在一間診療室外面。
One of them was crying very loudly.
其中一個(gè)小孩子哭得非常犬聲。
2nd Child;Why are you crying?
第二位小孩子說(shuō)：“你為什么哭呀?”
1st Child:I came here for blood test.
第一位小孩子說(shuō)：“我來(lái)這里驗(yàn)血呀”
2nd Child：So?Are you afraid?
第二位小孩子說(shuō)：“那又怎樣?你害怕呀?”
1st Child :No .Not that.For the blood test,they cut my finger.
第一位小孩子說(shuō)：“不怕呀，又不是那樣啦。因?yàn)轵?yàn)血的話，他們要割我的手指頭啦。”
At this,the second one started crying.
一聽到這么說(shuō)，第二位小孩子就開始哭了，
The first one was astonished.
第一位小孩子就非常驚訝。
1st Child :Why are you crying now?
第一位小孩子說(shuō)：“你現(xiàn)在為什幺哭呀?”
2nd Child :I have come for my urine?test!
第二位小孩子說(shuō)：“我來(lái)這里微尿液檢驗(yàn)的啦.!”
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