簡(jiǎn)短有內(nèi)涵的英語(yǔ)笑話
簡(jiǎn)短有內(nèi)涵的英語(yǔ)笑話
由于冷笑話是近些年來(lái)爆紅的一種新的言語(yǔ)幽默形式,到目前為止,幾乎沒(méi)有對(duì)其細(xì)致且系統(tǒng)的研究。下面小編整理了簡(jiǎn)短有內(nèi)涵英語(yǔ)笑話，希望大家喜歡!
簡(jiǎn)短有內(nèi)涵英語(yǔ)笑話摘抄
地鐵(中英)
A Yankee fan，a Met fan, and a blond are sitting together on the subway when the lights go out and the car goes completely dark. There’s a kissing noise, and then the sound of a really loud slap.
一名揚(yáng)基隊(duì)的球迷，一名邁特隊(duì)的球迷和一位金發(fā)女郎坐在地鐵里。這時(shí)，地鐵里的燈突然滅了，一片黑暗。有一聲親吻的聲音，然后就是一個(gè)很響的耳光聲。
When the subway car's lights come back on, the blond and the Met fan are sitting as if nothing happened，and the Yankee fan is holding his slapped face.
當(dāng)?shù)罔F里的燈重新亮了以后，金發(fā)美女和邁特隊(duì)的球迷坐在那里，就像是什么都沒(méi)發(fā)生一樣，而那個(gè)揚(yáng)基隊(duì)的球迷則捂著被打的臉。
The Yankee fan is thinking, "That Met fan must have kissed the blond and she swung at him and missed, slapping me instead.”
那個(gè)揚(yáng)基隊(duì)球迷想:“一定是那個(gè)邁特隊(duì)的球迷親了那個(gè)金發(fā)美女，然后她沒(méi)打到他而打到了我。”
The blond is thinking, "That Yankee fan must have tried to kiss me, accidentally kissed the Met fan, and got slapped for it.”
那個(gè)金發(fā)美女在想:“那個(gè)揚(yáng)基隊(duì)球迷一定是想親我，但意外的親到了那個(gè)邁特隊(duì)球迷，所以挨了一巴掌。”
And the Met fan is thinking; "This is great. The next time the subway car's lights go out, I’11 make another kissing noise and slap that Yankee fan again.
那個(gè)邁特隊(duì)球迷想:“這太棒了。下次地鐵燈再滅的時(shí)候，我就再弄一聲親吻的聲音，然后再去打那個(gè)揚(yáng)基隊(duì)的球迷。”
簡(jiǎn)短有內(nèi)涵英語(yǔ)笑話鑒賞
口信(中英)
It is December 30 1999 11:00 P. M.，Bill Clinton, Bill Gates and Boris Yeltsin appear before god.
一九九九年十二月三十日晚上十一點(diǎn)，比爾·克林頓、比爾·蓋茨和鮑里斯·葉利欽出現(xiàn)在上帝面前。
God:I have called you here with me because to my opinion you are the three most important men on earth. I want you to spread the message that I will destroy the earth on January 1. I will now send you back. . . spread the message.
上帝說(shuō):“我把你們叫到這里來(lái)，是因?yàn)槲矣X(jué)得你們是世界上三個(gè)最重要的人。我想讓你們散布一個(gè)消息，就是我將在一月一日的時(shí)候摧毀地球。我現(xiàn)在把你們放回去，散播這個(gè)消息。”
Boris Yeltsin: He gathers his comrades and says, "Friends, I have good news and bad news for us: The good news is God exists; the bad news is that the world will be destroyed soon.”
鮑里斯·葉利欽:他招集他的同志然后說(shuō):“朋友們，我有兩個(gè)壞消息:一是上帝確實(shí)存在;二是地球?qū)⒑芸炀蜁?huì)毀滅。”
Bill Clinton: Clinton gathers his staff members and senators and says, "I have good news and bad news: The good news is that God exists; the bad news is that he will destroy the world.”
比爾·克林頓:他招集參贊和議員然后說(shuō):“我有一個(gè)好消息和一個(gè)壞消息:好消息是上帝確實(shí)存在;壞消息是他將毀滅地球。”
Bill Gates: Gates gathers all his managers and says, "I just have good news for you guys:1 am one of the three most important people on the planet; The Y2K一bug is solved.”
比爾·蓋茨:他招集所有的經(jīng)理然后說(shuō):“我有兩個(gè)好消息告訴大家。一個(gè)就是我是這個(gè)星球上三個(gè)最重要的人之一，二是計(jì)算機(jī)千年蟲(chóng)問(wèn)題終于能解決了。”
簡(jiǎn)短有內(nèi)涵英語(yǔ)笑話賞析
理論與現(xiàn)實(shí)(中英)
One day a son asked his father what was the difference between "theory" and "reality". His father thought and then said "Go ask your Mother if she would sleep with the next door neighbor for a half million dollars.”
一天，兒子問(wèn)他的爸爸“理論”與“現(xiàn)實(shí)”有什么區(qū)別。他的爸爸想了想，然后說(shuō):“去問(wèn)問(wèn)你媽媽?zhuān)欠裨敢鉃榱宋迨f(wàn)美元去和隔壁鄰居睡覺(jué)。”
The son went to his mother and asked her. She thought about it for a minute and
then said, "Yes，yes I would.’，The son returned to his father and told him her reply. The father then told the son to go ask his sister if she would sleep with the next door neighbor's son for a half million dollars. The son went to his sister and asked her. She thought about it for a minute and then replied, "Yes, yes I would.”
兒子找到他媽媽問(wèn)了她那個(gè)問(wèn)題。她想了一分鐘后說(shuō):“是的，我愿意。”兒子回到他爸爸那里告訴了他媽媽的答案。孩子的爸爸又讓兒子去問(wèn)他的姐姐是否愿意為了五十萬(wàn)美元去和隔壁鄰居的兒子睡覺(jué)。孩子找到他的姐姐問(wèn)了那個(gè)問(wèn)題。他姐姐想了一分鐘然后告訴他，她也愿意。
The son returned to his father and told him his sister also said she would. The father said，"Well son，there you have it. In theory, we're living with a million bucks. In reality，we're living with a couple of whores.”
孩子回到他爸爸這里把姐姐的答案也告訴了他。爸爸說(shuō):“很好兒子，現(xiàn)在你就知道區(qū)別了。從理論上講，我們家現(xiàn)在已經(jīng)有一百萬(wàn)美元了。從現(xiàn)實(shí)來(lái)講，我們家有兩個(gè)妓女。”